Scotch Quotes

The best blended Scotch in the history of the world - which was also the favourite drink of the Iraqi Baath Party, as it still is of the Palestinian Authority and the Libyan dictatorship and large branches of the Saudi Arabian royal family - is Johnnie Walker Black. Breakfast of champions, accept no substitute.

I've been on the whisky diet - I've already lost three days!

When Jack Benny has a party, you not only bring your own scotch, you bring your own rocks.

The light music of whiskey falling into glasses made an agreeable interlude.

I should never have switched from Scotch to Martinis.

Too much of anything is bad, but too much good whiskey is barely enough.

Whenever someone asks me if I want water with my Scotch, I say I'm thirsty, not dirty.

I wanna get drunk 'til I'm off my mind. One bourbon, one scotch, and one beer.

Whoever said laughter is the best medicine had clearly never tasted scotch.

Giving up my scotch? My Macallan 18? That was hard for me! Though now that doesn't even sound good, being pregnant. You crave other things. A big thing of water sounds great!

A scotch buzz is the best buzz in the world.

Happiness is having a rare steak, a bottle of whiskey, and a dog to eat the rare steak.

I have this extraordinary life during the day, and then I get to come home to my sweet husband who loves to cook with me. I have a nice glass of wine, he has some scotch, we chat, we cook, and we hang out with the dog. I have an absolute dream life.

Because of some defect in my motor skill, I can never COMPLETELY wrap [gifts]....If I had been an ancient Egyptian in the field of mummies, the lower half of the Pharaoh's body would be covered only by scotch tape.

Had I been brighter, the ladies been gentler, the Scotch been weaker, had the gods been kinder, had the dice been hotter, this could have been a one-sentence story: Once upon a time I lived happily ever after.

I don’t want any of this artificial superficial feeling stimulated by the choir. Today I have proved myself a glutton—​for Scotch oatmeal cookies and erotic thought. There is nothing left to say of me.

If there's a God out there, then i would hope he has more important things to attend to than my drinking scotch or eating pork.

It's not good to throw back scotch with a new fetus.

I love to sing, and I love to drink scotch. Most people would rather hear me drink scotch.

If you take a scotch whiskey and distill out the alcohol, what is left has an amazing taste to it and can be used as a flavoring for a dessert.

We're trying to make our current house look domestic so that somebody will want to buy it. We're making a lot of simple, obvious improvements that never would have occurred to us to make while we actually lived here, because, tragically, we both happen to be domestically impaired. If we were birds, our nest would consist of a single twig with the eggs attached via Scotch tape.

Language can't describe reality. Literature has no stable reference, no real meaning. Each reader's interpretation is equally valid, more important than the author's intention. In fact, nothing in life has meaning. Reality is subjective. Values and truths are subjective. Life itself is a kind of illusion. Blah, blah, blah, let's have another scotch.

The bastard brat of a Scotch pedlar.