Mitch Hedberg Quotes

I find clothes so constricting!

No-pocket jeans are only slightly less irritating than thong underwear.

You can't really indulge in anything when you're wearing a unitard. No bread, no beer, no anything delicious.

I hate wearing anything tight. A corset is my idea of torture.

I couldn't figure out what to wear under my clothes. The body shapers were too thick at the time.

I try not to wear anything I have to fidget with - there's nothing worse than wearing something and pulling down the hem and re-adjusting the top. My pet hate is when girls wear those strapless dresses and spend the whole night yanking them up.

Something that's very painful for me is when people wear pants that are too short.

It doesn't feel good when you have to struggle to get your pants on.

I'd just lie around all day. It's the chemo, the poison they pump into you. Sometimes I'd be walking across the room and think, 'There it is; I got to rest.' And I had to, right then.

I've never been happier to be born in this time than when I was wearing a corset.

Conservatives literally view it as a kind of a weakness to talk to people other than their own. Nothing would bore me more than to sit around talking and listening to a bunch of liberals all day.

I find dates, in general, horrific. We have to sit there and ask these questions and pretend to eat a meal, and it just feels so stiff.

I feel uncomfortable in anything tight or body-con.

Getting stuck in a plane for four hours on the tarmac on the hottest day of summer in Italy - it was like being trapped in a boiling tin can.

I have always been really scared of trousers, they aren't flattering.

Whenever I wear things that feel too tight or dig in that's always a clear understanding that I'm not going to feel good that day.

I don't do well in plaid.

Wearing a corset is extremely uncomfortable.

For Fox, it's extremely discomfiting not to be No. 1 all day, every day.

I guess a normal woman would find it extremely enjoyable to wear fancy clothes. For me, I didn't enjoy it. It felt like a straight jacket.

Really I was open-minded about doing anything, but the one thing I didn't want to do was get myself into a corset, because I was worried I'd never get out again.

I love fashion, obviously, but I hate trying on clothes.

Worn with tights it is not an issue, although there is something deeply unfeminist about not being able to sit down in one comfortably.

I'm not completely against khakis. It's just the level that you have to wear them. The higher you pull them, then more excruciating it is.

On corsets: I said, You have got to be kidding. I am an ape and yet I am still expected to squeeze myself into one of those damn things.