Humorous Experience Quotes

On vacation in Indonesia, I ran out of skin-colored zinc, so I used green, and locals called me Hulk.

My mum told me the best time to ask my dad for anything was during sex. Not the best advice I'd ever been given. I burst in through the bedroom door saying "Can I have a new bike?". He was very upset. His secretary was surprisingly nice about it. I got the bike.

And so the dentist says 'Rinse.' So you lean over, and you're lookin' at this miniature toilet bowl.

I started Pilates. I'm the only guy in there. They plot before I get there: 'How can we make John look ridiculous?' Because every exercise involved my legs up, like I'm in the stirrups or something.

Once I was doing a sponsored walk. In the end I managed to raise so much money, I could afford a taxi.

I found it quite funny when my teacher at secondary school saw me bowl and wanted me to throw the javelin. So I tried, and I kept hitting the back of my head!

I was chased through a chateau in the Loire Valley by a bunch of American school girls.

I love 'Safe Men.' Now it's getting all this culty kind of - it just came out on DVD. That was awesome. I read that script, I never laughed so hard in my life.

The 'Hey now's' are delivered as people pass me. As I just get near ear range, I hear, 'Hey now!' and that's very funny.

One time when somebody showed up in a wedding dress, but I never knew if it was a joke, or she was serious. She asked me to marry her. She was serious. It was pretty funny.

Getting fan mail from Brazil is kind of funny.

I once said the wrong movie name to Aaron Eckhart, and boy did he tease me about it for years.

Katy Perry still gets me every time. She's very funny in person! We met at the Teen Choice Awards and she pulled my cheeks apart and told me how cute I was. My life was literally flashing before my eyes!

You can't be a casual observer of something humorous - you have to engage, you have to find it funny for the relationship between actor and audience to work.

Tonight I walked around the pond scaring frogs; a couple of them jumped off, going, in effect, eek, and most grunted, and the pond was still. But one big frog, bright green like a poster-paint frog, didn't jump, so I waved my arm and stamped to scare it, and it jumped suddenly, and I jumped, and then everything in the pond jumped, and I laughed and laughed.

I get a different pronunciation at least every week. I think the worst one, or the funniest one I got, somebody called me, 'Oh-gooz-man.'

I get a call from my sister. They go, 'We met the funniest, funniest doctor in Newport Beach.' And they introduced me to Dr. Terry Dubrow.

My parents let my old room out to students studying abroad and my dad can never remember their names. They had a boy called Gerchen staying for over a year once and my dad called him 'courgette' the entire time.

Do people always act this way around you? (Kiara) You should have seen the reactions when I wore a League uniform. Those were actually comical. Except for the ones who lost control of their bowels. Then it was just messy. (Nykyrian)