Rodney Dangerfield Quotes

I think that every sexual position is fundamentally comic.

I really think that sex always looks kind of funny in a movie.

Animals are a continuous source of inspiration and wonder to me. I would love to play a dog.

You've got to have a sense of humour about sex. When you look at it, it's all pretty ridiculous, isn't it?

I think Secretary's funny, it is about sex, and there's a lot of sex in it, sex is the key, but you're talking about a lot of other complicated things.

A man who fails is funny... if my sketches teach anything, it is that, for the male, sex is a snare and a delusion. What's so corrupting about that?

Everyone's sex life is funny except your own. Every person's is, and yours never is.

Dogs are born knowing exactly what they want to do: eat, scratch, roll in disgusting stuff, sniff and squabble with other dogs, roam, sleep, have sex. Little of this is what we want them to do, of course. We ask them to sit, stay, smell peasant, practice abstinence, and be accommodating.

A human being having a full emotional conversation with a dog is funny, innately. It's one of those things where you get in a scene and you always go for what is the best joke, and a talking dog for some reason, whatever he says, is hilarious." (about his role wiht a talking dog in the forthcoming MEN IN BLACK sequel.

The comic spirit masquerades in all things we say and do. We are each a clown and do not need to put on a white face.

Jenks, you can fly me up the rest of the way to Trent, and then pow! I give Trent his statue." "Pow, you'll be naked!" Jenks exclaimed. (Rachel and Jenks)

I had a dog that was so lazy, he had a prerecorded bark.

Sex is pretty funny, let's face it. And the more seriously we take ourselves, the funnier sex gets, I think.

My dog didn't like me very much. My first dog, Dmitri, was a poodle. I used to think Dmitri was something I could play with and ride. I tried to ride a poodle. And then he bit me.

As you can see, I speak many languages, including the language of sex.

Animals talking are very rarely funny. But animals behaving as animals - always funny.

With my dog I don't get no respect. He keeps barking at the front door. He don't want to go out. He wants me to leave.

When Beethoven went deaf, the mynah bird just used to mime.

Billy (Martin) was a great one for jokes. He liked to play a joke more than anyone I ever knew.

I get more ass than a giant donkey stable.

I bought a dog the other day. . . . I named him Stay. It's fun to call him. . . . "Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!" He went insane. Now he just ignores me and keeps typing.

Next to sex my favorite thing is laughing - it's part of sex. Make me laugh - I'll love you.

It's amazing how much actual chicken sounds lend themselves to stupidity.

Rats have a sense of humor. Rats, in fact think the world is very funny. And they are right, dear reader. They are right.

Sex is the most important sort of adult play. If you can't relax here you never will