Cecily Strong Quotes

[Donald] Trump is a [Hillary] Clinton Christmas gift.

Someone asked me "what do you think of Donald Trump?" And I said, "I would rather vote for Hillary Clinton in jail." If she gets convicted, I'll vote for her for president.

Bill and Hillary Clinton have one central idea in their uncluttered, ambitious minds: Hillary in 2008. Let Bush get re-elected, use the '04 primaries and general election to clean out the underbrush of competing Democratic candidates, and proceed unimpeded to the '08 nomination.

In a crazy world where he would get nominated, I'd like to see Obama run against Herman Cain. That would be fantastic. If Herman Cain became president, there'd be a certain sort of morbid curiosity for me.

I voted for [James] Buchanan because I didn't know him and voted against [John C.] Fremont because I did know him.

Donald Trump has been saying that he will run for president as a Republican, which is surprising since I just assumed he was running as a joke.

Let me let you in on a secret. I do plan to be on the podium with President Clinton when she's inaugurated in January 2017 - but I'm going to be sitting with the senators.

Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama are two peas in the same pod, and the American people have tasted that, and said, 'Look, that's not a good taste.'

Imagine a world where Hillary Clinton actually knew what she was talking about.

I'm not saying that Paul Ryan would weep if Bernie Sanders won Texas but it's definitely possible.

It's fun to perform Bernie Sanders and give his boring percentages and fact-based points to address some ridiculous Trumpisms, because that was always my fantasy for what the general election would look like.

If your calling is media, if your calling is media, fine, if your calling is sports, whatever it is, but you've gotta be the greatest you can be now. Now. Before America is so completely altered and we're left with Hillary's brain, in the Oval Office, in a jar. Because that's what we're getting.

Democrats do have a historic race going. Hillary Clinton vs. Barack Obama. Normally, when you see a black man or a woman president an asteroid is about to hit the Statue of Liberty.

I really like John McCain. He's an awesome dude and was a lot of fun when he hosted "SNL." I'd love to see a McCain-Giuliani "rage" ticket.

I voted for Ralph Nader in 2000, but I will not make that mistake again. The joke is over for Nader. He was funny once, but now he belongs to the dead.

Well, the big story -- Hillary Clinton will be running for president in 2008. You know why I think she's running? I think she finally wants to see what it's like to sleep in the president's bed.

Hillary Clinton said that Libyan leader Moammar Gadhafi is engaged in 'theater.' Which explains the new strategy to defeat him: casting him as the lead in 'Spider-Man: the Musical.'

I never thought that Bill Clinton should be the president. When he was running to be the president of the United States, he said on over a hundred occasions, he said the following: He said, 'One of the great accomplishments while I was the governor of Arkansas, was to take my state in education from 50th to 49th.' And I thought, ' you know, Bill, you should keep that a secret.

You know what I think that button [in Kremlin] should have read? It should've read "delete." Y'know, she [Hillary Clinton] is very good at that by the way.

John Kerry was the big winner in Iowa. Ted Kennedy introduced Kerry as the 'comeback kid.' That used to be Bill Clinton's name - because every time he would come back to a city, he would find out if he had a kid or not.

Marco Rubio announced he's running for president. Fun fact: Marco Rubio's wife is a former Miami Dolphins cheerleader. In other words, she knows how to generate fake enthusiasm for someone who's not going to win.

Rick Perry is the perfect candidate for those who thought George W. Bush was just too dang cerebral. And Adios, Mofo is the perfect guide to his record, his rhetoric and his remarkable hair. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll vote.

Republicans are calling the Bush-Cheney ticket the 'Wizard of Oz' ticket. One needs a heart and the other needs a brain.

Texas governor Rick Perry said God is calling on him to run for President. But Michele Bachmann said that God is calling on her to run for President. You know, if God is that indecisive, he's probably for Mitt Romney!

He spent more time on the road to Damascus than a Syrian camel driver. And we thought nobody could fill John Kerry's flip-flops! ... [Romney's record was] anything but conservative until he changed all the light bulbs in his chandelier in time to run for President.