Jojo Moyes Quotes

"What's so unpleasant about being drunk?" "Ask a glass of water."

March is the month God created to show people who don't drink what a hangover is like.

I am told by those who know that there are six varieties of hangover-the Broken Compass, the Sewing Machine, the Comet, the Atomic, the Cement Mixer and the Gremlin Boogie, and his manner suggested that he had got them all.

Promise me one thing: don't take me home until I'm drunk - very drunk indeed.

Wine maketh the band quivering, the eye watery, the night unquiet, lewd dreams, a stinking breath in the morning, and an utter forgetfulness of all things.

Maybe she was drunk - the woman never could drink. One little sniff of tequila and she was off into some blonde la-la land.

A real hangover is nothing to try out family remedies on. The only cure for a real hangover is death.

You don't quite know how drunk you are until all of a sudden you're on the floor.

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

Sometimes the hangover provides inspiration.

I simply don't know how to act as if I am drunk.

I've never been drunk, but often I've been overserved.

It's always difficult to make conversation with a drunk, and there's no denying it, the sober are at a disadvantage with him.

If drunk were cookies, I'd be Famous Amos

Alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, may produce all the effects of drunkenness.

If getting drunk was how people forgot they were mortal, then hangovers were how they remembered.

It was too much Tequila, or not quite enough.

Nora: "How do you feel?" Nick: "Terrible. I must've gone to bed sober.

He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days.

I was so drunk last night I fell down and missed the floor.

Man, being reasonable, must get drunk; the best of life is but intoxication.

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.

You come home, and you party. But after that, you get a hangover. Everything about that is negative.

A man is never drunk if he can lay on the floor without holding on.

I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.