P. J. O'Rourke Quotes

Well what's funny is, again, people say they believed what was going on, but again, Bob's hands are about three times bigger than his feet. So these are very caricatured.

After this interview, I'm going to immigration to try to sort out my Green Card, just like any other normal person.

I have watched Muslims chant 'Death to America!' on the streets of Tehran, then privately beg me to help them get a visa to the United States.

People want to come to Pakistan but are not given visas. We wish for visas to be given to those people who want to come to Pakistan.

There are over 10 million ethnic Poles in the United States which make the U. S. a comfortable place to visit. But Poles going to Disney World go to Paris instead of going to Orlando or Los Angeles. Why? Because they do not want to endure the indignity of having to stand in line to get permission to travel to the United States.

When we were here during the General Assembly, before that there was another meeting in Pittsburgh, and there were some demonstrations. Police treated the people violently.... The governments and the political systems in the West don’t believe actually in human rights.

As a 4-star admiral, I visited over a hundred U.S. embassies all around the world, and I never failed to see lines of locals seeking visas to our nation.

I think any immigrant who comes to this country also knows somebody who is undocumented.

Mr. Trump wants citizens of other nations to know that there is a legal process that needs to be followed, and that that process is only way to come to America.

When someone decides to come to the U.S., he knows what he's getting into.

It's very important that people understand that for refugees to come into the USA is very difficult. What upsets me about the whole situation is that people don't know the difference between a migrant and a refugee; they don't have respect for what people are coming from - the people who against it - and they have completely forgotten this is what built our country, the diversity. When it is put forward that masses of people are dangerous, and the actual numbers and the situation are proven to be completely the opposite of the way they're presented publicly, it's horrible.

Sacred cows make the best hamburger.

Australia is not very exclusive. On the visa application they still ask if you've been convicted of a felony - although they are willing to give you a visa even if you haven't been.

Every time I ask for visa, they (USA) give me visa for five years. I have never had any problem in getting a visa to any nation.

You must understand the environment in Pakistan. This has become a moneymaking concern. A lot of people say if you want to go abroad and get a visa for Canada or citizenship and be a millionaire, get yourself raped.

Funny, isn't it? The airlines go to all that trouble to keep you from taking a gun on board, then they just hand you a dinner roll you could kill a musk ox with.

The Hawaiian Islands were discovered by hardy Polynesian sailors, who crossed thousands of miles of open ocean in primitive canoes, braving violent storm-tossed seas for months at a time. My family and I arrived by modern commercial aviation, which was infinitely worse.

An exotic and irrational entertainment.

He was by no means opposed to hard labour on principle, for he would work away at a cricket-match by the day together, - running, and catching, and batting, and bowling, and revelling in toil which would exhaust a galley-slave.

Sometimes you're the windshield; sometimes you're the bug.

Let me see you ride a donkey over my green again, and as sure as you have a head upon your shoulders, I'll knock your bonnet off, and tread upon it!

Elsewhere in Italy is the lovely city of Venice, which each year attracts millions of visitors despite the fact that it is basically an enormous open sewer.

Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar.

The Russians will never be able to get their missiles thought the dense protective layer of delayed flights circling over the United States in complex, puke-inducing holding patterns.

"Ah, Miss, hope is an excellent thing for such as has the spirits to bear it!" said Mrs Wickam, shaking her head. "My own spirits is not equal to it, but I don't owe it any grudge. I envys them that is so blest!"