P. J. O'Rourke Quotes

Practically all the relationships I know are based on a foundation of lies and mutually accepted delusion.

We live in a world where it's so accessible to date now, which is great. I don't judge that. We have so many ways of meeting people. I like to meet someone and have that chivalry, to take them out on a date and actually be a gentleman. I think that's becoming rarer and rarer.

I had a friend who, after 25 years of marriage, found himself trying to date again, and it was completely different. Everything had changed, and he had to reacquaint himself. It was funny even talking to him about it. For someone who has been out of the loop, it's a different world.

When I don't have a girlfriend, who I am answerable to, I can go out and hang with people. But whether you go for a movie with someone or a meal or a drive, it is assumed that you are dating that person.

When people talk about the impact of mobile dating, everyone focuses on real-time meeting - this idea that my pocket will vibrate every time a hot girl walks by. That's important. But it's not transformative.

We don't do 'dating' in Sweden.

I don't do a lot of dating. I guess it's kind of like everyone is always trying to set me up with somebody, so we go out and hang out at a club or somewhere. I think dates are weird.

Personally, I don't like a girlfriend to have a husband. If she'll fool her husband, I figure she'll fool me.

Infidelity has always existed, but I feel like it was brushed under the carpet, behind the scenes. Now everyone is at it - and they've stopped pretending they're not.

I have a Tinder account. Now I've done Bumble, and I've tried this other one, and the way I justified it is that... because I'm on TV, I shouldn't be eliminated from participating in what's going on in the world. But people are always like, 'I can't believe you're on a dating app!'

A lot of times, when I met somebody and took them out on a date, I obviously didn't tell them my background, because I didn't think I'd see them but once or twice.

You may hear the most beautiful things, you may hear promises, you may hear everything you want to hear but if the person you're dating is not following up with their actions then they're just words.

I've thought long and hard about this, and I think a lot of the dysfunction around dating has to do with men having the control.

I always felt that, for me, as a woman, I always had to wait around. In all other arenas, I was ambitious and a go-getter, but when it came to dating, I wasn't supposed to go after what I wanted.

Are we solving the world's problems by allowing women to make the first move on a dating app? No. But I do believe we are helping to change some very archaic norms.

My grandmother told me: "We all dated lots of different boys because no one was having sex or kissing. It was just going out for sodas and getting to know people. It didn't seem like there was a threat." I think now we have more ideas of people having premarital and unprotected sex.

There is no better way to get to know someone than to have an affair ... it can save years of lunches.

There used to be two kinds of kisses: First when girls were kissed and deserted; second, when they were engaged. Now there's a third kind, where the man is kissed and deserted. If Mr. Jones of the nineties bragged he'd kissed a girl, everyone knew he was through with her. If Mr. Jones of 1919 brags the same, everyone knows it's because he can't kiss her any more. Given a decent start any girl can beat a man nowadays.

When men give lines, women learn to not trust men. When women wear makeup, men learn to not trust women. Male lines and female makeup are divorce training.

The day is for honest men, the night for thieves.

I have always believed that the key to a happy marriage was the ability to say with a straight face, 'Why, I don't know what you're worrying about. I thought you were very funny last night and I'm sure everybody else did, too.

Let's face it: a date is a job-interview, that lasts all night. The only difference between a date and a job interview is: not many job-interviews is there a chance you'll end up naked at the end of it.

I've never done online dating.

Dating is tricky these days. Everyone plays by different dating rules, so don't assume anything.

With girls, I don't think right. I had a date with one girl, she had mirrors all over her bedroom. She told me to come over and bring a bottle. I got Windex.