JULIAN CLARY

There is a single entendre, but I don't know about a triple one.

I'm not sure how aware of the rest of the world I am. I live a rather sheltered existence.

It's almost a way of life. I know what makes me laugh.

I didn't think of myself as a tart, but I wouldn't argue with anyone who did.

Just because someone's dead doesn't mean it's over. My grandfather died more than 25 years ago, but I still think of him a lot and smell his smell.

I live in a kind of gay bubble. I live in a gay house, I drive a gay car. I eat gay food.

It's a wise thing to hold back.

I think Australians like a bit of vulgarity.

However light-hearted you try to be about it, the loss of youth, and everything that goes with it, is quite a trauma.

Rodents can come across as being quite vacant in the personality stakes.

It was all about wanting to get revenge. Pathetic, really, but it still is the motivation.

If I've been here a long time, I think: I must go to London and speak to someone or see a bus.

I've found a more personal, pagan kind of religion to satisfy the spiritual side of things.

The public has always had affection for gay entertainers. The time was right for an out gay entertainer.

The English like eccentrics. They just don't like them living next door.

I thought a dignified thing to do would be to live in the country by the time I'm 50 and write books.

I'm currently in an interesting correspondence with a nun about forgiveness.

I knew that this was what I wanted to talk about on stage. There was no point being coy about it, or pretending that I wasn't gay. That was the substance of my whole act. If you took that away, there would be nothing left.

I get just as much of a thrill out of constructing a good sentence that gets a laugh at the end as I do from a joke.

The bullying was hideous and relentless, and we turned it round by making ourselves celebrities.

The whole business of getting famous was good fun, but it was a long time ago.

The good thing about getting older is that, as you become less attractive, so you have less desire to go out and conquer everyone you see.

I am full of gratitude for my life - and for this house.

I was lightweight - that was the whole point of me.

A lot of gay men have a lot of sex. That's what we do. But I've stopped all that-the revolving door into my bedroom. Promiscuity. That was of its day, really.