Getting older is tough. I remember the last time I felt an erection. It was at the movies. The only trouble is, it belonged to the guy sitting next to me.
I can still chase women, only downhill
I'm at an age where I think more about food than I do about sex. Last week I put a mirror over my dining room table.
My mother once told me that if a married couple puts a penny in a pot for every time they make love in the first year, and takes a penny out every time after that, they'll never get all the pennies out of the pot.
Chastity is not chastity in an old man, but a disability to be unchaste.
Old people they lose their sex life and that's not a good time. That's why they get divorced all the time.
Sex after 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope. Even putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.
