Root Canal Quotes

My teeth are all my own. I've just finished paying for them.

My lower and upper teeth had to be removed.

I could give you absolutely sterling advice on how to avoid writing, how when you run out of things to do other than going to your desk and writing, when every closet is reorganized and you've called your oldest living relative twice in one day to see what she's up to and there isn't an unanswered e-mail left on your computer or you simply can't bear to answer another one and there is no dignity, not a drop left, in any further evasion of the task at hand, namely writing, well, you can always ask your dentist for a root canal or have an accident in the bathtub instead.

I'm okay with having horrible lower teeth.

Better a tooth out than always aching.

I hate dentists. That's why my tooth fell out. I was in the middle of a root canal and wouldn't go back, so it just dropped out when I was in the middle of Fifth Avenue.

People ask me, 'Have you ever considered doing stand-up?' To me it would be less offensive if someone asked me, 'Have you ever considered dental implants?'

Everyone knows what toothache's like: it's one of those dull pains that just won't go away.

I wanted to be a dentist actually.

I've come to look upon death the same way I look upon root-canal work. Everyone else seems to get through it all right, so it couldn't be too difficult for me.

Tax Day is right up there with 'Root Canal Day' in terms of days that no one wants to celebrate.

I live at the dentist's. I'm on my third set of teeth that they put in with nails and screws.

I'd rather go to the dentist... but I'm going.