My center is giving way, my right is in retreat; situation excellent. I shall attack.
Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.
I was in the Air Force and was a boom operator (in-flight refueling). I got my comedy start in the Air Force.
Senator John Kerry is in trouble for making a joke about soldiers being uneducated. As a result, Kerry promised to stop making jokes and stick to boring people.
The way I understand it, the Russians are sort of a combination of evil and incompetence... sort of like the Post Office with tanks.
Today is Veterans Day. Thank you to all our men and women who have served the United States armed forces. In honor of Veterans Day we are marching out a few jokes that have already served.
When I write 'Beetle Bailey,' I can always do jokes about him being lazy, and everyone gets it.
To me, serving wasn't uncommon, and my service paled in comparison to so many of my friends who had done so much more. In my world - as a citizen soldier - I was surrounded by other soldiers just doing their jobs.
My first few films were institutional comedies, and you're on pretty safe ground when you're dealing with an institution that vast numbers of people have experienced: college, summer camp, the military, the country club.
I would like to thank the people who encouraged me to draw army cartoons at a time when the gag man's conception of the army was one of mean ole sergeants and jeeps which jump over mountains.
We all know it's brutal up there at the front, especially those of us at the rear.
In the Army, I was very good at avoiding my job!
What did I tell you about Mister Safety Catch?' said Vimes weakly. When Mister Safety Catch Is Not On, Mister Crossbow Is Not Your Friend,' recited Detritus, saluting.
I thought to myself, Join the army. It's free. So I figured while I'm here I'll lose a few pounds.
There was a lot about the military that I thought was pretty silly, but these cartoons weren't meant to take a poke at anybody or anything. They were meant to make people laugh.
Odyssey Dawn? That's not a military operation. That's a Carnival Cruise ship.
G.I. humor is similar to cop humor.
I'm right there with you, darlin'. Unless you step on a landmine, in which case I'm way back in the Operations Room.
U.S. soldiers, with whom I now have more than a passing acquaintance, joke that they track my movements in order to know where they will be deployed next.
I do a lot of stuff with Wounded Warriors and the Armed Forces Foundation; if you want to get these guys to stop talking, start complimenting!
The only thing strong about the French Army is their damn body odor.
The first dead man on Omaha Beach must be a sailor!
Ranger’s gonna hate this,” Tank said. “Better to get shot than to have to explain the gate. Bad enough I got a horse that smells like his shower gel.
['Dad's Army' show]was a military thing but also very funny, so it's kind of the two things that I experienced by being a soldier, and I found it very humorous then and there, because of the juxtapositions [and] me and my emotional state.
A chaplain's assistant is customarily a figure of fun in the American Army.
