Caffeine Content Quotes

Decaf is like masturbating with an oven mitt!

There are sixteen cans of coffee here; together they hold a total of thirteen and a half pounds of coffee. Doesn't that seem like cheating?

Coffee must be treated gently and smoothed out. I hadn't realised it was so temperamental.

American coffee can be a pale solution served at a temperature of 100 degrees centigrade in plastic thermos cups, usually obligatory in railroad stations for purposes of genocide, whereas coffee made with an American percolator, such as you find in private houses or in humble luncheonettes, served with eggs and bacon, is delicious, fragrant, goes down like pure spring water, and afterwards causes severe palpitations, because one cup contains more caffeine than four espressos.

It's too early for there to be any coffee. I stare dully at the empty pot in the common room, while Sam picks up a jar of instant grounds. "Don't," I warn him. He scoops up a heaping spoonful and, heedlessly, shovels it into his mouth. It crunches horribly. Then his eyes go wide. "Dry," he croaks. "Tongue...shriveling." I shake my head, picking up the jar. "It's dehydrated. You're supposed to add water. Good thing you're mostly made of water." He tries to say something. Brown powder dusts his shirt. "Also," I tell him, "that's decaf.

Blue cheese contains natural amphetamines. Why are students not informed about this?

I like to have my cup of green tea.

I like my coffee sweet and creamy, that's why I drink Great Taste White.

Espresso, made by steam expressing finely ground coffee, is rich in flavor and aroma and chlorogenic acids, but not very concentrated at all in caffeine.