Fran Lebowitz Quotes

I think people tend to be worried about every new technology that comes along.

I don't like phones. You can't be sure people are paying attention to you when you're talking to them.

People put on their earphones, they lay out their phones, they put - open up their computers, and they convince themselves that they're most productive when they're focused on their e-mail, when, really, they're ignoring the cafeteria, the watercooler, the meetings with colleagues, the times when really the creativity, collaboration happens.

People tend to set themselves up in patterns; something happens, it hurts them, then something similar happens, and - it's happened again! It seems much bigger then, and they get worried and go through life looking for that thing, and because they're so concerned and looking for it, when anything that happens resembles that thing, they're sure it's happening again. So sometimes people think things are repeating even when they're not.

The phone was her worst enemy and her best friend but she never knew which until she answered it.

When I get to work with people I admire, it's such a bonus, so it was an easy sell when I got this phone call asking, 'Will you do this thing with David Strathairn?'" Also, they didn't ask me to audition, which is another bonus. But they said, "All your scenes will be with David," and I said, "I'm there!"

Friends call me Hitch. Maybe it can be turned into a 900-phone number. People would pay to talk to me.

Don’t let people interfere with you. Boot ’em out, turn off the phone, hide away, get it done. If you carry a short story over to the next day you may overnight intellectualize something about it and try to make it too fancy, try to please someone.

I am so happy to be communicating with people on this newest of new wavelengths which to some older people must seem like a kind of magic.

I've never felt so bereft and panicky. What do I do without my phone? How do I function? My hand keeps automatically reaching for my phone in its usual place in my pocket. Every instinct in me wants to text someone, 'OMG, I've lost my phone! ' but how can do that without a bloody phone?

The weird thing is, I used to skate in front of, like, 5,000 people and I was never nervous, but the first time I got on stage, there were four people there and I vomited.

I don't like hello. It makes me sound like I have dementia, like I've never heard a phone ring before and I don't know what's supposed to happen next. Hello?

Like most people, you listen to yourself on the phone or an answering machine and you're like, 'Ugh.' So to do something with just your voice is hard.

Most people are so frightened of the name of mathematics that they are ready, quite unaffectedly, to exaggerate their own mathematical stupidity.

Of course, the underlying structure of everything in England is posh. There is no in-between with these people. You have to walk a mile to find a telephone booth, but when you find it, it is built as if the senseless dynamiting of pay phones had been a serious problem at some time in the past. And a British mailbox can presumably stop a German tank.

I try not to do email; I try to talk to people on the phone.

Anything invented after you’re thirty-five is against the natural order of things

People who relate what they believe to be new and startling information like to have such information received with exclamations of astonishment and admiration.

Women do get drunk, they do get sick and they do get food poisoning. It seems to be a bit of a surprise to people that they are seeing it.

You sit or stand in the subway, and you look around - I do, because I don't have a phone so I'm not playing a game - and you see people.

I hate phone calls so I believe in a telephone armistice. To me, the idea of calling someone unprompted is basically saying, 'Hey, stop whatever you're doing and talk to me right now.

I don't care how people read their comics, I want them to read comics. I don't care if they read them on an iPad or a phone or in store, I just want them to read comics.

People treat you like s*** when you're a doorman or a busboy. I licked envelopes for eight hours a day for this management company and cried half the time I was there while the managers were on the phone working.

Godshawk looked surprised, the way that people generally do when you ask them philosophical questions in shrubberies in the middle of the night.

That's one of the surprises in the research, that's it's not young people who are smitten with their phones. It's their parents who are not paying attention to them.