Michael McIntyre Quotes

Christmas is more stressful with present buying and making sure everyone gets included, but Thanksgiving is really not that. I don't ever really get stressed out about the food.

The only thing I liked about Christmas as a kid was the gifts; otherwise, it just seemed like a stressful time.

I try and get all my shopping done before December so all the presents are wrapped in my lounge and ready so I can really relax and enjoy Christmas.

Holiday shopping is a challenge. Stores are crowded; people are stressed and rude... not exactly the spirit of the season.

The holidays are only overwhelming because it's crunch time. It's like everyone trying to get last-minute things in before the New Year starts.

Belief is invisible, so there is enough space for everyone's. Except in the shops at Christmas.

I set a personal record on Christmas. I got my shopping done three weeks ahead of time. I had all the presents back at my apartment, I was halfway through wrapping them, and I realized, 'Damn, I used the wrong wrapping paper.' The paper I used said, 'Happy Birthday.' I didn't want to waste it, so I just wrote 'Jesus' on it.

Does anything good happen a couple days before Christmas? Nothing good happens just a few days before Christmas.

My son was 8 or 9, and he really wanted a gun. It was Christmas, and I said to my husband, 'It's time for a gun.'

I am a veteran of the War on Christmas. I am just emerging from a battlefield strewn with dead trees and torn shreds of brightly colored wrapping paper.

October, November, December is a huge selling season globally for Nintendo.

Only now that I'm a mum can I fully understand the terrible pressure parents feel buying presents for their kids. My mum had four children plus all of the extended family and she not only had to feed us all but she bought presents for everyone, too.

It's definitely a little bit ironic being known for my hair because, as a little girl, I had no idea what I was doing with it. I was insecure about it. I didn't have as many references to curly girls, and I wanted to just fit in with all my other friends.

The problem with most of the want-to-be authors is that they are unable to focus. Either they have no idea of where to begin, or they have hundreds of ideas and don't know which one to pick. Both scenarios leading to one result... they give up even before they start.

My problem with present buying is usually lack of time. Not because I'm super-busy, I'm just super-lazy. I leave everything to the last minute and end up running up and down the high street on Christmas Eve like a crazed baboon.

The world is so mysterious, and there's so many social interactions where I have no idea what I'm supposed to do - what's being asked of me, what's expected of me.

Christmas is relentless. It's around the clock. I sit with my little ones in front of the TV screen, and we watch movie after movie after movie.

I listened to this book, 'The Beauty Myth,' about how beauty standards are messing with women in Western society, and I was like, 'I don't know this.' I have no idea, and I don't pretend to, but now I'm more aware of it because I've engaged on that frequency.

It's a ridiculously expensive time of year and if you buy something that you've guessed at and it's not right, what a waste of money. Far better to ask. And if you do it with three or four weeks to go, by the time it comes to Christmas you've forgotten about it - so it's a lovely surprise.

It's not exactly calm at Christmas. It's a bit like the Simpsons appearing in a pasta advert - lots of bickering, crazy pets, and plenty of tomato sauce!

I have to confess that I've never been a great fan of Christmas or, as it's known in our house, The Monster That Ate the Last Third of the Year. It's mostly the rampant consumerism I object to, but I'm also a little wary of the annual crop of new Christmas stories and sometimes wonder why anyone bothers.

My December is typically one big, sweaty 'wintry mix' blur, not a punch-laden, heartwarming mixer.

Christmas is the biggest holiday in numbers - in terms of gross amounts - because you have one and a half to two months.

When it comes to gift giving, I always want to get everyone a little something. The problem is that every time I go holiday shopping for others, I come out of the stores with shoes for myself.

I am a bit of a mother hen at Christmas! I always prepare in advance. It is the only way; otherwise, it can be really daunting.