Bassem Youssef Quotes

I'm tired of being hunted all over. I can't go anywhere without criticism.

The government’s prosecution of me was intent not on serving justice but on meeting out retaliation, reprisal and retribution for the purpose of relentlessly punishing a whistleblower and warning potential whistlebowers so that you can not only lose your job but also your very freedom.

Armed police at my apartment doors in 2011 was scary, but the sudden - and not exactly legal - takeover of 48 per cent of VKontakte, that coincided with a fabricated case against myself in April 2013, was more frightening.

There is a man out there who prosecuted me. He's been constantly calling different lawyers, telling them how afraid of me his is. He's afraid I'll come after him now that I'm out, because of all the horrible things he did to me. The furthest thing from my mind I would ever do is waste a day being vindictive.

I didn't even need America, I was so popular outside the country, until the prosecutin' attorney came from Washington, and said, judge, we cannot let this man go to Japan and fight, because they are anti-American.Now, if I want to leave the country, I know how to leave. Tomorrow. Quick. Easy. If I really want to leave. That's not the intention. The intention is to stop me from makin' a livin'. To punish me.

If you're ringing my doorbell eight times every three minutes and hiding behind my garbage cans, I will call the police. That is literally harassment.

I got beat up my whole life.

I don't enjoy being interviewed. I feel like it exhausts a lot of my energy. I feel empty after.

For me to bully anybody, that sounds unbelievable.

I think all of us have a sense if we imagine the kind of world we would face if the people who bombed the mess hall in Mosul, or the people who did the bombing in Spain, or the people who attacked the United States in New York, shot down the plane over Pennsylvania and attacked the Pentagon, the people who cut off peoples' heads on television to intimidate, to frighten indeed the word 'terrorized' is just that. Its purpose is to terrorize, to alter behavior, to make people be something other than that which they want to be.

America is a mere bully, from one end to the other, and the Bostonians by far the greatest bullies.

The way that things happen in Egypt, the government - or the head of the government - don't get personally involved. They were always goonies and agents and people who do that kind of work for the government either by direct instructions or because they think that they're doing something good or they want to be on the good side of the government.

She said, “I’m going to have you fired.” I had two people say that to me today, “I’m going to have you fired.” Go ahead, be my guest. I’m wearing a green velvet costume; it doesn’t get any worse than this. Who do these people think they are? I’m going to have you fired!” and I wanted to lean over and say, “I’m going to have you killed.

The coaches of some players who are my own age keep saying publically about me: "This guy is going to be one of the greats." I am clever enough to know that they do not truthfully think so. They are trying to shake my confidence. Of course, this is a matter of tactics.

I just did an arc with Warren Ellis - and no one else on the planet could get away with this, because I think this is like harassment? - But Warren felt like there was a depiction of Spider-Woman where it looked like her waist perhaps didn't contain any internal organs. And he suggested very quietly ... 'You should fix that, or else I will come to your house and nail your feet to the floor and set your house on fire.' ... And it totally got fixed!

I always get ‘What’s wrong?’ or ‘Lighten up.’ Half the time, when guys tell me to smile, I’m not even frowning, I’m thinking! Then I’m like, Oh! Some men don’t want women to think! Do they all have walkie-talkies? Are they all in this together? Like, ‘OK, she’s thinking, someone say something. She’s reading, go distract her.’ It starts feeling like that sometimes, doesn’t it?

Leave the girl alone, Clete, and let's get back on the road," the tall driver said, and his voice had that "I'm done with you" edge to it. "I don't know who this guy is, but I don't think he changes into a nutria.

He was beastly tired, but it was hard to stop. One more book, he had told himself, then I'll stop. One more folio, just one more. One more page, then I'll go up and rest and get a bite to eat. But there was always another page after that one, and another after that, and another book waiting underneath the pile. I'll just take a quick peek to see what this one is about, he'd think, and before he knew he would be halfway through it.

They changed the press conference, they are trying to change the time of the weigh-in. They are trying to mess with me, but what they don't realize is that they are only fueling me to bring more hurt.

When an archer is shooting for nothing, he has all his skill. If he shoots for a brass buckle, he is already nervous. If he shoots for a prize of gold, he goes blind or sees two targets - He is out of his mind! His skill has not changed. But the prize divides him. He cares. He thinks more of winning than of shooting- And the need to win drains him of power.

If you go to ice and you think, 'I must score' or 'I must get some points,' you won't score or get any points. You must go and play and don't think about it.

People get intimidated because they think I have everything, but it's just not true.

It's too much pressure. You have to think match by match and moment by moment or it drives you to distraction. I'm tired of all the talk about it. Everyone is obsessed with it...If I was the type of person who had tennis, tennis, tennis all the time and I went to bed and ended up dreaming about tennis, I would go nuts.

I wasn't prepared for this big room with clattering typewriters and teletype printers. You could hardly hear yourself think.

On her daughter, Jessica: Kids at her school will sidle up to me and say, Does Jessica know what happens in book 4? Does Jessica know the title of book 4? And I keep saying, No! There is no point kidnapping her, taking her around back of the bike shed, and torturing her for information.