Todd Burpo Quotes

Real crying usually lasts two minutes or less, but may continue for five. After that point, the child is merely complaining... I would require him to stop the protest crying, usually by offering him a little more of whatever caused the original tears.

A strong-willed child - a strong-willed child, more than anyone else, needs to learn to use emotion and discussion to resolve issues. That's the last child in the whole world you want to hit.

Obviously, you want to teach your child between right and wrong, respect and being kind to others, whether it's their sisters or parents. You try to teach them by example, talk to them and explain certain situations. But there's also a time to put them in time out or let them know they've made a mistake and try to learn from it.

Anytime you have a difficult encounter with your child, there is a good chance that at least one of these factors is bringing out the worst in him or her: transitions, time pressure, competition for your attention, conflicting objectives.

I'm not a parenting expert by any means, but I've been interviewing and writing about kids for almost 20 years.

I know that many people disagree with the way I disciplined my child. I also understand after meeting with a psychologist that there are other alternative ways of disciplining a child that may be more appropriate.

Fussing over children who cry only encourages them. That's positive reinforcement for negative behavior.

Any child can be taught to be beautifully behaved with no effort greater than quiet patience and perseverance, whereas to break bad habits once they are acquired is a Herculean task.

Ellen had long ago stopped being embarrassed by temper tantrums. She flipped it and wore it like a badge of honor. A temper tantrum was a sign that a mom said no when it counted.

I think our children are afraid to die because we're afraid to die.

There's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender.

That was interesting, to find that it wasn't hunger that caused children to become bullies on the street. The bulliness was already in the child, and whatever the stakes were, they would find a way to act as they needed to act. … Intelligence and education, which all these children had, apparently didn't make any important difference in human nature.

You can't punish a child who is acting out because of sensory overload.

Some strong-willed children absolutely demand to be spanked, and their wishes should be granted. Two or three stinging strokes on the legs or buttocks with a switch are usually sufficient to emphasize the point, 'You must obey me.'

When gentle persuasion [of children] falls on deaf ears, we resort to ridicule and rebuke. Then we return to threats and punishment. This is the modus operandi of a mutual frustration society.

Your toddler will be "good" if he feels like doing what you happen to want him to do and does not happen to feel like doing anything you would dislike. With a little cleverness you can organize life as a whole, and issues in particular, so that you both want the same thing most of the time.

Spare the rod and spoil the child - that is true. But, beside the rod, keep an apple to give him when he has done well.

The only form of action open to a child is to break something or strike someone, its mother or another child; it cannot cause things to happen in the world.

We must learn to die, and to die in the fullest sense of the word. The fear of the end is the source of all lovelessness

Notoriously insensitive to subtle shifts in mood, children will persist in discussing the color of a recently sighted cement-mixer long after one's own interest in the topic has waned.

When it seems you have nothing at all to live for, death is not especially frightening.

Death is terrifying, but it would be even more terrifying to find out that you are going to live forever and never die.

Love is at the root of all healthy discipline. The desire to be loved is a powerful motivation for children to behave in ways thatgive their parents pleasure rather than displeasure. it may even be our own long-ago fear of losing our parents' love that now sometimes makes us uneasy about setting and maintaining limits. We're afraid we'll lose the love of our children when we don't let them have their way.

Some children do what they’re told to do; some children do what they’re told not to do; all children do what they’re parents have done.

If you strike a child, take care that you strike it in anger, even at the risk of maiming it for life. A blow in cold blood neither can nor should be forgiven.