South African schoolchildren set a world record this week by creating the world's longest clothesline. Hey, what do South Africans wash their clothes with? Apar-Tide!
Poetry, I feel, is a tyrannical discipline. You've got to go so far so fast in such a small space; you've got to burn away all the peripherals.
I like vocabulary and I actually read a book called 'Word Freak,' which is about a guy who basically went into competitive Scrabble for a year. But having a big vocabulary and being good at Scrabble are not the same thing.
My greatest regret as a writer is that I've never been able to include as many jokes as I'd like.
Poetry is not a matter of feelings, it is a matter of language. It is language which creates feelings.
I always told everybody the perfect joke would be where the setup and punch line were identical.
I'm not tryin' to come off as the best lyricist.
I could dance with you until the cows come home. On second thought I'd rather dance with the cows until you come home.
I tried to make the punchline as close to the setup as I could. And I thought that was the perfect thing. If I could make the setup and the punchline identical to each other, I would create a different kind of joke.
I'm not a writer. I know a lot of writers; I know a handful of really excellent, great ones, and I know what they're like. They are in love with language. They're obsessed with it. Even if their thoughts aren't more special than anybody else's, they have a way of putting them into words that makes them sensational.
My approach to writing rhymes went hand in hand with the music. I'd try to make different rhythms with my rhymes on the track by tripping up patterns, using multi-syllable words, different syncopations. I'd try to be like a different instrument.
During the Samuel Johnson days they had big men enjoying small talk; today we have small men enjoying big talk.
What is the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector? The taxidermist takes only your skin.
One thing that I do find really sexy is a girl who's good at crossword puzzles.
Lil Wayne, that was one of my main influences, music-wise, because of his wordplay and metaphors.
In 1991 I did an interview wherein I described myself as a 'teetotal Christian,' which was an exaggeration, although I do like tea and Christ.
I find something funny when it lives on many levels - a level of self-deprecation, of knowledge and heightened reality.
I'm so down to earth, I'm bringing gravity back.
Hip hop has always been braggin' and boasting and 'I'm better at you than this' and 'I'm better at you than that.'
Always say 'no pun intended' to draw attention to the intended pun.
I love words; they are the quoits, the bows, the staves that furnish the gymnasium of the mind.
With rap, it's a funny thing. You can say things, and people can take 'em the way they wanna take 'em.
I think Shakespeare is really the one. Words as music and music as words. Everything he wrote was good, which is really frightening.
Impropriety is the soul of wit.
I went down the street to the 24-hour grocery. When I got there, the guy was locking the front door. I said, 'Hey, the sign says you're open 24 hours.' He said, 'Yes, but not in a row.'
