Never buy anything in a room with a chandelier.
Never guess your wife's size. Just buy anything marked petite and hold on to the receipt.
A man can - and should - spend hours trying on jeans and finding the cut for your body type.
Whoever coined the term "Buyer Beware" was probably bleeding from the asshole.
Never buy anything with a handle on it. It means work.
Always try clothes on before you buy them. Stand, sit, walk and inspect yourself from all angles before you buy it so you don't regret it later. Knowing what it looks like on you is very important, as your body shape must suit the cut of the outfit.
Never shop alone for your bridal dress. Take a friend and bring a camera to take a picture of you. Make sure to get a picture of the back view: that's the part of the dress most people are going to see for the longest time.
Take the advice of light when you're looking at linens or jewels; Looking at faces or forms, take the advice of the day.
Shoes, men, coffins; never accept the first one you see.
If the shoe fits, buy another one just like it.
You don't have to just shop in the maternity section when you are pregnant - you can shop anywhere, just be shape and size savvy!
Never buy anything that eats while you sleep.
