Legalese Quotes

Yakka foob mog. Grug pubbawup zink wattoom gazork. Chumble spuzz. I love loopholes.

The government uses words that make almost no sense to those of us in ordinary life.

We are drowning in partisan rhetoric that is just true enough not to be a lie; in industry-sponsored research; in social media's imitation of human connection; in legalese and corporate double-speak.

Everytime a lawyer writes something, he is not writing for posterity, he is writing something so that endless others of his craft can make a living out of trying to figure out what he said. Course perhaps he really haden't said anything, that's what makes it so hard to explain.

The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer.

Modernity has replaced ethics with legalese, and the law can be gamed with a good lawyer.

He has the common feeling of his profession. He enjoys a statement twice as much if it appears in fine print, and anything that turns up in a footnote... takes on the character of divine revelation.

I've always had an affinity for lawyers. My dad is a lawyer. He's retired now. My brother is a lawyer. It's always been easy, the legalese.

There is something monstrous in commands couched in invented and unfamiliar language; an alien master is the worst of all. The language of the law must not be foreign to the ears of those who are to obey it.

It always rankled me - in law school and the legal profession - when lawyers would speak to each other in their own exclusive language.

Lawyers love paper. They eat, sleep and dream paper. They turn paper into gold, and their files are colorful and their language neoclassical and calli-graphically bewigged.

The first part of the party of the first part shall be known in this contract as the first part of the party of the first part shall be known in this contract-- Look, why should we quarrel about a thing like this? We'll take it right out, eh?

Why in the world would you have it interpreted by nine lawyers?

When I write legally, I try to write very plain, very vanilla, very clear.

I told him that I thought it was law logic - an artificial system of reasoning, exclusively used in Courts of justice, but good for nothing anywhere else.