Robert Farrar Capon Quotes

Vice is a dreary business. And virtue is not a lot of fun, either.

Dost thou think, because thou art virtuous, there shall be no more cakes and ale?

Sin ought to be something exquisite, my dear boy.

Sin can bring pleasure, but never happiness.

Procrastination is like a credit card: it's a lot of fun until you get the bill.

Destroy the seed of evil, or it will grow up to your ruin.

Sinful and forbidden pleasures are like poisoned bread; they may satisfy appetite for the moment, but there is death in them at the end.

If we misuse the gift of sexuality, we're going to suffer the consequences, and I firmly believe we are suffering the consequences.

I try not to do bad, but sometimes it's irresistible.

I lied for years and years. And the thing about lies and secrets is that they eat you alive from the inside. I would not wish that pain on anyone.

All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening.

We have drunk too much of your rum already, which has occasioned our destruction; we will, in the future, beware of it.

Nothing brings more pain than too much pleasure; nothing more bondage than too much liberty.

Though sin often brings immediate pleasure, it gives no lasting joy.

I have a simple principle for the conduct of life- never to resist an adequate temptation.

No, I don't do drugs anymore, either. But I'll tell you something about drugs. I used to do drugs, but I'll tell you something honestly about drugs, honestly, and I know it's not a very popular idea, you don't hear it very often anymore, but it is the truth: I had a great time doing drugs. Sorry. Never murdered anyone, never robbed anyone, never raped anyone, never beat anyone, never lost a job, a car, a house, a wife or kids, laughed my ass off, and went about my day.

My own feeling is that if adultery is wickedness then so is food. Both make me feel so much better afterward.

The Anglo-Saxon conscience does not prevent the Anglo-Saxon from sinning, it merely prevents him from enjoying his sin.

You can have your cake and eat it. But my God, it will go rotten inside you.

The difference between weakness and wickedness is much less than people suppose; and the consequences are nearly always the same.

We all do the wrong thing. And then we have to wake up the next morning and live with the fact that we have done things that are wrong.

Wisdom is better than weapons of war; but one sinner destroyeth much good.

I never drink. I cannot do it, on equal terms with others. It costs them only one day; but me three, the first in sinning, the second in suffering, and the third in repenting.

That's just the way: a person does a low-down thing, and then he don't want to take no consequences of it. Thinks as long as he can hide it, it ain't no disgrace.

I mean, most fun things are bad for you in one way or another.