Polly Berrien Berends Quotes

No one tells you that your life is effectively over when you have a child: that you're never going to draw another complacent breath again... or that whatever level of hypochondria and rage you'd learned to repress and live with is going to seem like the good old days.

Having a baby is like suddenly getting the world's worst roommate.

I'm doing stand-up comedy. I'm working on a one-woman show about how I don't like my baby. There is a period of time where a baby is born where the next 3 months is harrowing. A lot of people say it's the most wonderful time, but for me it was harrowing.

A baby is such a huge change for everyone, so acknowledge that. It's hard, and you don't have to be great at everything right away.

I don't watch television because I have a tiny baby daughter. I'm useless.

Isn't it so weird the day you wake up and you're just going with the flow? And you just suddenly are a mom.

You just don't understand humility until you have children and get divorced.

I was 20 when my daughter was born, and making all these plans during my wife's pregnancy. I was going to be the perfect father. Once she was born, it was suddenly, 'Oh, my God! I'm a parent!'

Having an infant is difficult. It's a lot of work, and I didn't hire any help because I overestimated my own abilities.

Having children is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain.

I'm a mother with two small children, so I don't take as much crap as I used to.

It's true; once you are a father, there's no turning back. Your heart strings as well as your purse strings are never again the same.

The uncertainty of parenting can bring up feelings in us that range from frustration to terror.

Everything with me is pretty close to the surface, but having kids has completely ruined my emotional equilibrium.

When I found out I was pregnant, I was 22. It was really scary because I was working the music thing, and with a kid coming, you just can't live that life with a child.

You know, I have a kid on my own, and I know how busy it is, the first weeks and the first month.

It's very difficult leaving the house anytime with my baby at home.

However pragmatic you are, it is very demanding being a new parent.

I didn't expect babies to need so many diapers. Nobody told me they needed to be changed so often.

Being a mom, it's up and down; it's a little bit of a rollercoaster.

New motherhood is such a vulnerable and powerful time, but it's also really hard.

Going from one kid to two kids is insane.

I remember there being a period of time when I had a baby, and I was so sleep-deprived that I'd get into having no filter, and that was not good.

My whole life turned upside down once I became a mother.

I got fired from WWE and it felt like our lives got turned upside down.