I went through every phone book in Africa, and I didn't find one god damned Pryor!
The average man has a carefully cultivated ignorance about household matters - from what to do with the crumbs to the grocer's telephone number - a sort of cheerful inefficiency which protects him.
These are my wakeup cupcakes, some anti-depressants and a cellphone book.
If you’re purely after facts, please buy yourself the phone directory of Manhattan. It has four million times correct facts. But it doesn’t illuminate.
I noticed whenever you call information, 411, there's always a computer voice, and they go, 'What number would you like? City and state, please.' 'Yeah, I'd like the number of Macy's in Century City, California.' 'Did you say 'pretzel nuggets'?
I come from the Lynchs of Sligo. You know, I went there, but I looked in the phone book and there are nine million Lynches in Sligo.
I wanted a name that would put us first in the phone directory, or second if you count ABBA.
If David Bowie wants, I'll put him in my phone book.
