My only window into the Internet is Twitter because I am afraid of the Internet. I need my mom to hold my hand if I'm going to read anything about me.
I don't like modernity. I don't have television or the Internet at home. The Internet scares me. I can't drive a car.
I don't shop online. I'm always scared to put my credit card on the Internet!
I never go online. The Internet stuff is bonkers. You must not look at it.
I'm scared of the Internet. That's not real, but it is. I'm worried about what it's doing to us.
If I could edit Google Images, then I wouldn't be as scared of the Internet.
I'm a bit of a chicken when it comes to seeing potentially horrifying things on the Internet.
'Flash mobs' are reported on extensively because they're novel and can be used to stoke fears of young people and the Internet. The media, of course, have absolutely no clue what they're reporting on.
