Iyanla Vanzant Quotes

If your mother did not know how to love herself, or your father did not know how to love himself, then it would be impossible for them to teach you to love yourself. They were doing the best they could with what they had been taught as children.

It's too distracting to read about yourself. You want to be perfect and you want everyone to love you, and that's never going to happen.

If you want to love others, I think you should love yourself first.

If you don’t find a way to love a flawed person, secretly you’re teaching yourself that you are not lovable because of your flaws.

I want people to love me, but it's not going to hurt me if they don't.

You want to love unconditionally everything you do, or don't do it.

I learned to love myself, because I sleep with myself every night and I wake up with myself every morning, and if I don't like myself, there's no reason to even live the life.

What I am is how I came out. No one's perfect and you just have to accept your flaws and learn to love yourself.

Being a survivor doesn't mean being strong - it's telling people when you need a meal or a ride, company, whatever. It's paying attention to heart wisdom, feelings, not living a role, but having a unique, authentic life, having something to contribute, finding time to love and laugh. All these things are qualities of survivors.

You have to be able to love yourself because that's when things fall into place.

Hopefully this movie will help people understand that if a child is never given the tools to know how to love others and love and respect themselves, this is what happens.

When you love and accept yourself, when you know who really cares about you, and when you learn from your mistakes, then you stop caring about what people who don't know you think.

If you aren't good at loving yourself, you will have a difficult time loving anyone, since you'll resent the time and energy you give another person that you aren't even giving to yourself.

Most people have a harder time letting themselves love than finding someone to love them.

I am convinced we do not only love ourselves in others but hate ourselves in others too.

I love, but I am not entirely sure how to be loved: how to be seen and known for the utterly flawed woman I am. It demands surrender. It demands acknowledging that I am not perfect, but perhaps I deserve affection anyway.

Narcissist: psychoanalytic term for the person who loves himself more than his analyst; considered to be the manifestation of a dire mental disease whose successful treatment depends on the patient learning to love the analyst more and himself less.

I must learn to love the fool in me - the one who feels too much, talks too much, takes too many chances, wins sometimes and loses often, lacks self-control, loves and hates, hurts and gets hurt, promises and breaks promises, laughs and cries.

When we have ceased to love the stench of the human animal, either in others or in ourselves, then are we condemned to misery, and clear thinking can begin.

The first step is to distinguish the loving parts of your personality that are active from the frightened parts of your personality that are active - in other words, to learn to distinguish love from fear in you. The second step is to choose love, no matter what.

You know, I think I'm a stronger person for realizing that you can't make everybody love you.

Until you are somewhat comfortable and confident and embrace who you are as a person, you can't possibly love somebody else because you don't like yourself that much.

A lot of women don't know how to love because there's deep reasons for them not knowing how to love. And what I mean by deep reasons is deep and dark reasons.

If you don't have a healthy relationship with yourself, how can you with anyone else? Even if it's not healthy, I imagine it's a lot of fun. And healthy or not, I still think there can be a lot of love.

People sometimes ask when I learned to love myself. But that was not the issue.